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No, Rey- I need you to try. I know it's impossible, I know nothing can fucking come of it, but on the off chance it can, please, try, because this is fucking killing me- take the long shot, tilt at the windmill, I know it might feel foolish, but I need you to-

[To be willing to risk making a fool of herself.]

[For a moment, she just stares at him, eyes on his as she takes him in. She's known, for awhile, that this place is weighing on him. She understands that Harry going must have been the final straw, the thing that made trying bear all of this impossible.

She's done the impossible before. She has the Force on her side, more of a grasp on it thanks her time here, training with Luke, figuring things out on her own. After a long moment of thinking and chewing on her lower lip, she stands up so she can pace just in front of where he's seated. She thinks better when she's moving.]

Tell me everything you know about how people leave here.

[He doesn't know. It doesn't matter, honestly- she won't be able to do a damn thing, but that isn't the point.

The point is that she'll try, so Alfie leans soundlessly over to lie down on the bunk, completely trusting. Her spine is safe from him.]

Tomorrow. For now, let's just-

[She's still thinking about it, though. Things made in the Enclosure disappear when taken out of it so trying to crash the Falcon through the walls of the Barge doesn't seem like it would work...

But when she looks at Alfie again she stops, watches him get comfortable. And she hates herself for this, for making everything worse, but she doesn't see how waiting, putting it off will make it any easier.]

I- This isn't a good time and I'm sorry, but I wanted to tell you this first before I tell the rest of the ship. Tommy's in a coma. He fell asleep this morning and hasn't moved since.

Fucking prick. He's always had the most inconvenient timing that ever there fucking was.

[Alfie curses, eyes still shut.]

[She absolutely agrees with that, albeit for entirely different reasons, so she nods even though his eyes are closed and finally comes back to sit next to him again.]

He caused you lot of problems with that back home, too?

I am sure that he has.

[He can't think of anything specific right now, but sort of holds everything against him, at the moment, up to and including his back pain.]

[It's easy enough to tell that that's not going to be a conversation they have now, so Rey just looks Alfie over, the way he's laying, and decides to try again.]

I can show you were to press yourself to help with your back if you don't want me to do it.

No, go ahead- you can do it. [He says, a little calmer, a little more under control.] On my belly, eh?

That's right.

[And she rubs her hands together as she nods, trying to work some warmth into them. She's been running colder than usual lately and she doesn't think he'll be able to feel it through all his layers, but it wouldn't do to make this more uncomfortable instead of helping him.]

Max also said something about warmth helping. He suggested heating up rice in a sock.

Wouldn't it stick?

[He says, imagining it cooked, not particularly enamoured of the idea.]

[Maybe she should have asked for clearer instructions on that oops.]

I think you just heat it in a pan and put it in the sock.

[Once he's settled, she reaches over to run her hand down his spine, feeling out the bumps and dips and using what she remembers from her own massage to find the place that will be tender on Alfie. She doesn't push in just yet, just lays her palm over the collection of muscles she'll be working on so he'll be able to identify it himself later.]

It's just there. Tell me if it hurts, alright?

[And now she presses, very lightly at first, with her thumb to try to work those muscles loose.]

[Almost right away, Alfie grunts- the whole muscle in his leg twitches in response, heel kicking up a bit as his back registers a bad surge of hot, mean pain.

It's going to hurt no matter what, but for the moment, he tries keeping quiet.]

[She frowns, but keeps going with the same pressure. It might hurt before it starts to feel better and she hopes he'll tell her if it becomes unbearable, but hopefully this will do something for him.

She keeps it up, rubbing in gentle circles right where Max showed her would fix this.]

[Eventually, he has to hiss, and shake his head, eyes closing tight, hand lifting up and curling into a first. He can't- too much.]

What that accomplishes, I don't know.

[She stops immediately, frowning to herself at her failure. She'd done it just how Max had shown her, so why didn't it work? Was it the wrong spot?]

Do you remember when you offered to let me look into your head? If you let me now, I might be able to do this better, if you let me try again.

Now might not be the time, Rey. My head is full of the ugliest things.

[He lets her know, eyes shut.]

[As much as she'd like to help him, she can hardly push when he sounds the way he does. She nods instead, moves her hand instead to rub his shoulder in a very affectionate gesture before she takes her hands away entirely.]

We'll try another time. I'll talk to Max about which parts I got wrong.

No. It feels better- like setting a bone.

You didn't get it wrong.

[It just still hurts, is all.]

[Those are very mixed signals, but then again it is Alfie so perhaps she should just be used to that by now. It helps, though, to know it's a little better for him.]

Did it seem like it had gotten at all better since the Land of the Dead?

[The problem with this is that he's blanket miserable, and just projecting it everywhere. Shoving his way through that to think objectively about back pain isn't an easy task for Alfie, who actually runs extremely emotional and temperamental- beyond what he puts on for show.]

It's following the usual pattern. Improving, I would say, now that I'm resting it, but more gradually than I would like, and it'll likely not return entirely to where it was, which wasn't good to begin with.

I'll figure something out.

[The way she says it, though, makes it sound like she means far more than just fixing his back.]

It means a lot, that you'll try.

[He promises, and stretches out, closing his eyes.]

You'd better walk me home, or I'll end up in the bar.

[She doesn't say of course I will or that she hopes he knows he can come to her if he needs anything, because isn't that exactly what he did? It's touching in a way that has nothing to do with wardens or inmates, it's entirely about her being glad she's opened up enough to like people because if she hadn't, she would miss Alfie's presence in her life.

Angry and violent as he can be, she treasures him.]

I could always carry you home if you drank too much, but it does seem better to avoid that.

Nah.

[He complains, getting creakily to his feet.]

You're right. Come on, let's go now, then.

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garbagepilot - 2016-07-11 22:03 (UTC) - Expand